bimbo emo

I saw my female owner having an emo outburst today. It was so unexpected that we turtles were left wondering, “what was that for?”

It all started when her mother came home at 2235hr and started asking her innocently about the status of her offer. My female owner self-ignited. Must have been pent-up emotions. The more she spoke, the more agitated she became and the more the tears flowed. It got so bad that my female owner stopped chatting with people on MSN.

She wanted to talk physically to someone, but again, as she went down her mobile phone, she felt she couldn’t call anyone. Nothing wrong with any of her friends. It was more like she didn’t want to alarm anyone at such a late hour over what she deemed as a non-issue. In the sense that there are people struggling over bread and butter issues of life. Who is she to struggle over issues like should she stay in Australia or return to Singapore? So frivolous, she says.

And she finally couldn’t take the absurdness of crying unprovoked any more, she went on “invisible” on MSN. Only to receive a random message from Functional Fren about her travel plans (I guess he wasn’t really expecting an “invisible” reply). And as always, he manages to ask (or discern?) the right questions to ask – started with “why are you on stealth?”, and finally sussed out that my female owner was not too ok.

Being the kind-hearted, helping person he is, he offered to meet her to talk things through. Therapy lasted two hours and my female owner came home looking calmer but a little dazed. Apparently she was challenged, questioned, probed, laughed at and analysed. Certainly a very different and unorthodox manner of helping someone. She realised that she might have changed, and had unknowingly allowed pride to seep into her life. That pride is perhaps the root of her distress.

Usually tired and sleepy after crying, my female owner found herself strangely unable to sleep. Perhaps she is finally accepting the inevitable. And accepting it means grieving over it and not being able to get rest. While Brisbane changed her life for the better, having given her the breakthroughs that she needed to get away from her past experiences, my female owner reckons that she might reach a stalemate if she continues her happy-go-lucky life without any concrete goals.

I think my female owner is blessed to have such good friends. She used to struggle alone but over the past few years, has developed meaningful friendships with people who can connect intellectually and emotionally with her, hence helping to sort out the bimbo emo in her.