Yiruma - Ways going to school

My female owner is experiencing resurgence in her love for piano music. Some of you may know that she learnt to play the piano from a young age. What you may not know is that she was traumatised by her piano teacher. She was an old cranky lady who suffered from epilepsy. My female owner received home lessons and was often alone with the teacher. Hence, on the few occasions that the teacher suffered a fit, my female owner had to cope with the distress of seeing an unpleasant event by herself.

Certainly not a good way of nurturing a love for music in a young child. In addition, the teacher used to sing the melody line loudly into her ear (might have contributed to her tone-deafness!) and pinched her for fun or to get her point across. The teacher also did not believe in preparing her for music theory examinations and you can just imagine the shaky foundation her knowledge of music was built on. What unorthodox methods of instruction!

Yes, my female owner totally place the responsibility of her undeveloped/ suppressed/ traumatised music genes on this music teacher. Anyway, my female owner has been listening to Yiruma’s music on youtube and she is totally in love with his music. One of her favourite tunes is “Ways of Going to School”. Not only is it different from the rest of his music, it is played by four hands (she has always enjoyed duets more than solo performances). The precision of the two pianists simply amazes her.

withdrawal

My female owner is in her withdrawal mode these days.

She hasn’t really spoken to her housemates for days (maybe only three lines?). Traditionally, she does not really communicate much with housemates (no thanks to her upbringing where she hardly speaks to her brother). I think she has a big personal space radius. In fact, she would rather close her room door when she is at home, but knowing that they prefer to be “open”, she decided to compromise on that.

This is how she avoided talking or seeing them for days. In the mornings, she either leaves the house before they wake up (during working days) or snoozes in bed until they leave the house. Actually, maybe they are actually snoozing in bed until she leaves the house on her working days!

At night, if she reaches home before them, she will hole up in her room when they arrive home. Although her door remains open, she would not go out of her room until they have retired for the night. At other times, she reaches home late enough to know that they have retired for the night.

Not a very fun or engaging housemate to have, I must say. I think she functions better as a travelling partner, since the duration of close physical proximity is short-term and the common activities are stimulating and non-routine.

Hillsong - Centre of my life

One common prayer that Christians make to God is that they want God to be the centre of their lives.

My female owner is no exception. Recently, God showed her the image of a photograph and asked her “Where am I, in this photograph?”

My female owner knew what God was saying. The photograph represents her life, different elements that make up her life. Her family, her friends, us turtles, her studies, her different interests (e.g. aikido, outdoor activities, music etc), her dreams, experiences, fears … and God.

For a long time, God had been tucked in one corner, far away from the centre. Despite her spiritual upheavals over the last decade of her life, my female owner cannot deny the realness of God. At the same time, for many reasons, she had allowed other things (tangible and intangible) to take centre stage in her life.

She is now in the midst of “photo-shopping” this photograph. To remove those elements which had overstayed, to prune away others which had grown weeds and uproot uninvited residents. To increase those elements which deserve a bigger and more prominent position in her photo and even add in missing elements!

lessons

Lessons from the dying:

I have listened to many people at the end of their life’s journey. From them I have learned how precious each breath can be, how wonderful it is to have people who love you, how delicious a cup of coffee can be, how blessed it is to be without pain. For the dying, I have learned much about the details of life, looking and really seeing, listening and really hearing, touching and really feeling. I have learned about not wasting time, I have learned about focusing on real needs. From the dying, I have learned about courage. I have learned about seeking meaning and purpose in my own life. I have learned how important it is for me to acknowledge that my own life will come to an end. I have learned about a deeper spiritual consciousness, realising that our world is so much more than what we can touch, see, and measure. And yet, all of that, the dying claim to receive from us when we are congruent, empathic and show unconditional positive regard. All of this is healing in the midst of woundedness, healing in the midst of loss and grief.

- D.C. Smith (Living with grief: Who we are how we grieve)

melody

My female owner thinks that I-Fren and F-Fren should just talk to each other. Over the course of the past year, at different points in time, both of them had brought up different aspects of her level of functioning with her. While they sing different melody lines, after a while, the melodies harmonise into one coherent minor key song (songs in the minor keys are generally melancholic and sad).

Their song reached a crescendo last night, when their timings finally coincided and they literally sang the same tune in two different parts. First it was F-Fren with the remnants of Monday’s conversation. When that ended, I-Fren (intuitively?) took over and kept the music going. After that, even Potahto took over, as the sound mixer that gelled the different parts together.

Has my female owner been that easy to read and decipher? I don’t think so. If she is, her previous partner won’t have kept saying “I don’t understand you anymore”?

doubts

My female owner has great doubts about her abilities. She keeps thinking she is never good enough, the work that she is doing is never good enough, she will never be good enough. This is exemplified in her recent assignment, where she spent hours writing and re-writing the essay, because she felt it was not up to standard (well… she could be right actually).

Among many things, Functional Fren urged her to look back into her past experiences and achievements to understand where such self-harming thoughts originated. With skilful questioning and emphasis on certain words she used, he led her to understand how unhealthy vicious cycles had formed in her life. He also helped my female owner to separate herself from her thoughts by pointing out that there was nothing wrong with her as a person... the problem was with her thoughts. In challenging her to work on her dysfunctional core belief, he spelt out her reluctance to move forward “not that you can’t, you won’t”.

Such irony.

A trained counsellor doing CBT on a trained psychologist.

directions

Within her limited circle of friends, there are a few people who, from time to time, confront my female owner on her issues. I use the word “confront” because that is exactly what they do. They see a problem and they bring it to her attention directly without being euphemistic. Sometimes, she does not even know what her issues are until they start. When she tries to escape or divert the topic, they tell her straightaway to stay the course.

Tonight was another one of those (unexpected) times. This time, it came in the form of her Functional Fren. The MSN conversation started innocently with “how have you been?” She probably pressed his button when she started to say that the life she is living now is like a form of escapism for her. That she will be confronted with the harsh reality in two years time, with no career or savings or direction in life, and the only medal to her name is the title Dr.

Functional Fren then proposed that it was not that my female owner had no directions in life. It was more that she refused to receive directions. That got my female owner confused and she asked for clarifications. It came fast and strong, in the form of questions:

• how are u taking the fact that u are getting ur Doctorate?
• how do u feel about u not having much family obligations ( as compared to me) and leave singapore to pursue ur studies
• how do u feel about you actually the only one following the psych path as compared to your frens here in singapore
• how do u feel abt given the opportunity to study in UQ and best part of it.,. excelling in ur studies
• the thing is.. u need to be contented with all the blessed things u are given with.. and how u want to return God's favour..
• all ur frens here have been giving u the support that u need.. but u kept thinking u CMI..
  so isnt that refusal to receive directions in life?

Confronting but necessary. The conversation then steered towards other pertinent issues that he saw as a “big bloody baggage”. Cyber CBT. My female owner reckons that she needs therapy in addition to counselling...

yield

My female owner reported having a really fun weekend of escaping a looming assignment deadline. She had her schedule planned out for the weekend. It goes something like “Spend Saturday doing essay. Use one computer to read PDF files and the other to type essay. Meet Bxx for dinner if it doesn’t rain. Go to uni early on Sunday to print out essay to proofread and make final changes.”

Her intricate plans were disrupted with an impromptu jio from Mr Nice Guy (note: new friend label) to watch Star Trek at South Bank. Having been unable to join him in previous jios, she decided that she could well-afford this mini detour. They ended up watching A Night in the Museum with two other church friends. And movie extended to dinner at Runcorn at a Taiwanese restaurant called Green Tea Garden or something. The interior of the restaurant was painted a strong green! Poor female owner!

And the four of them had a whaling good time going gaga over their bubble tea. With names like First Kiss, Angel’s Kiss, Romance and Random, you can just imagine the jokes that crack up over statements like “I wanna enjoy my First Kiss”, “My Romance is too sweet for me!”, “I’m going to bring my Romance home”, “Look! Your Romance is getting diluted..”, “Mine is so Random!” They also had a pseudo-intimate sharing of their previous relationships and reasons why they ended. My female owner reckons that it was cathartic for a couple of them.

Saturday night escapade was supposed to end then. Except that Mr Nice Guy and Mr Romance wanted to rent DVDs to watch. My female owner put her foot down to say that she couldn’t join them because she had an assignment to do. Alas, under the combined persuasion powers of the two Mr, my female owner yielded to her true self and ended up watching Eagle Eye on a wide-screen plasma TV (so shiok she says!)

She ended up reaching home at about 12midnight…. But hey! Her conscience spoke up real loud (or it could have been the caffeine working in full force) and she worked till about 0400hr.

Sunday started late for her, at about 1100hr. Almost immediately, my female owner got her engine running and continued working on her violent essay. She had half a mind not to go for dinner with her church friends after church in order to make up for lost time. Ah, you got it right, she ended up going for dinner even though her conscience was tugging at her really loud. And what a dinner it was, with an impromptu addition of her I-Fren who drew out the often-unseen side of her (reserved only for selected categories of friends) in front of the rest of her bible study group friends. In her words, she probably has to do much damage control afterwards.

Once again, history repeated itself. Yielding to the combined persuasion powers of the two Mr, and she ended up watching Body of Lies. Reached home at 2300hr and worked till about 0300hr on her assignment.

There you go, a weekend with three movies and two ticklish dinners, right in the heart of Brisbane. Re-enacts part of a familiar lifestyle which my female owner left behind when she went over to Brisbane to study.

weaknesses

My female owner just had a MSN conversation with Mr Squabbles (after a really long time). She found out that he had always credited my female owner and another friend (her Librarian Fren) for being the two persons who jumpstarted his return to God.

My female owner was astonished at his revelation. Two years ago (before Easter 2007), when she jioed the both of them to church, she was actually lost herself and simply trying to get some church kakis. At that time, my female owner was still attached but she was not being supported in her quest to rebuild her relationship with God. She asked the two of them coz they were relatively close and were fellow Christians who had stopped attending church for one reason or another. Well, after a shaky start, the three of them established a regular Sunday routine for a few months before Librarian Fren left Singapore to further her studies.

Ah, as what my female owner said, “God can work with our weaknesses and make something good out of them”. Happily, two years later, the three of them have made progress in their Christian walk. It warmed my female owner’s heart to learn too, that Mr Squabbles had been praying for the both of them. Without doubt, his prayers have made a difference to their lives.

beloved

My female owner has been nursing the feeling that she is losing her friends in Singapore. She hasn’t heard from many of them for quite a while and wonders if this is the sad consequence of being away for too long. It has come to a point where she wonders if there is any point going back to Singapore since she has “no friends” anyway. Yes, she is still in her “no friends” mode for some reasons.

Anyway, what perked her up today was that her beloved aikido sensei wrote her a nice email to update her of his life (good news all the way!) and she even managed to have a short chat with him on MSN.

She misses him. He was someone who believed in her and never failed to encourage her through tough times (whether on the mat or at work). Knowing him changed her life for the better. His kind words, sweet gestures, fabulous story-telling abilities, sincere heart, unending energy, sensitivity and care made it difficult for her to leave Singapore.

Some people and some experiences are just irreplaceable.

milk

My female owner had another session with her Counsellor. Left her feeling depleted, coz she ended up crying (again). This time, the dams opened when my female owner was praying and renouncing her negative experiences and thoughts.

My female owner is getting somewhat frustrated with herself for being such a cry-baby. Just get over it, she says. No point crying over spilled milk! Somemore, so old already.

consolidate

My female owner couldn’t believe what she heard yesterday.

Despite the storm which was allegedly the worst South East Queensland had experienced since 1974 (In her usual oblivious state, my female owner didn’t realise that fact, until someone told her that the ferry services were cancelled and many places were flooded. She actually thought that heavy rain was similar to those she experienced in Singapore during the monsoon season), she went for a coordination meeting for externs who were also involved in the residential aged care placements.

The project coordinator updated that one of the externs who couldn’t make it for the meeting sent an email to tell her that “the externship had been very good and he was getting a lot of unique experiences”.

My female owner couldn’t believe her ears. Is that guy for real? Very good experience?

My female owner tried to consolidate some of her thoughts on the placement but didn’t get very far coz she was tired. Here’s part of what she says:

The placement at the residential aged care facility provided me with learning experiences that most other clinical psychologists-in-training would not have access to. The project coordinator affirmed us that we are the experts in this area, and that we are the trailblazers in providing clinical interventions to a population that has never had access to psychological services. I’m not sure if I agree with her.

From the word go, I was faced with the challenges of introducing the concept of psychological services to a cohort which has survived two world wars and are used to being fiercely independent and also, to gain the support of the staff at the facility who had little clue about our purpose. I learnt quickly, the need to be creative, flexible and patient as I adapted my textbook knowledge of psychotherapies to the raw reality of working with old-old adults (above 85 years old). They often do not understand the role of a psychologist, and tended to regard me as one of the volunteers/ staff whose job was to listen to their stories. They were not interested in therapies or working on their issues. They had reached a point of their lives where they were no longer interested in self-improvement. Rather, they were either looking back into the past to recount the days of youth, or in one of the residents’ words “just waiting to die”. Besides the physical barriers of ill-health, poor sight, bad hearing, cognitive impairment affecting communication, I also had to try to neutralise my accent so that I could be understood. So much to overcome, just to have a decent conversation, what more, therapy.

For a long time, I struggled with my professional self-concept. What could I value-add to these residents that volunteers and staff are already not doing? What more could I gain in terms of clinical training, besides active listening, reframing and reinforcing desirable behaviours? I was not developing my skills in assessment, formulating and treatment. I was frustrated at my non-learning.

Many times, I felt stuck and helpless as residents told me about their pain, their disabilities, their losses, their grief and their unmet desires. How do I respond to such pain? There is so much truth in their sufferings that CBT (“you need to change your thoughts”) feels so much more cold and heartless. You can only listen up to a certain point. After that, you start to wonder if this is all you can do. Listen and....? If I had a magic wand, I would not hesitate to wave over them, so that they could experience less pain, physically and emotionally. Working there, I reached a point where I do not wish to grow old. Let me die before I lose my functioning.

disturbing

My female owner finally received her marked assignment on “workplace bullying”. Students had to write a 1500-word essay on the topic (covering definitions, risk factors, consequences and implications for counselling practice) and a 1000-word personal reflection based on the research done/ personal experience.

Well, my female owner actually finished her personal reflection (centred on her personal experience with workplace bullying) before she completed the research writeup. Her lecturer graded her kindly for this section, with 28/30 and his comments were “I find your personal reflections a little disturbing… like you said, ‘ain’t psychologists supposed to help make life better?’…”

Oh well…. My female owner had been very disturbed by her experiences too.

waste

I wanted to come up with some random facts about my ex-male owner aka my female owner’s second ex, just like what I did recently about her first ex, but my female owner didn’t like the idea of me wasting time and cyberspace writing about him.

Oh well… Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Better do as she says, otherwise she might send a message to her parents to “starve the fat yellow turtle” My life is at stake!

boundaries

My female owner is traumatised. Her mother has just set up a Facebook account with the help of her brother, and obviously requested to be her friend.

Now, as with a paternal auntie who requested to be my female owner’s friend (my female owner hasn't approved the request), my female owner thinks that this is over-stepping the friends/ family boundaries. My female owner is racking her brains to explain this to her mother tactfully, without her feeling offended.

Any suggestions?

My female owner thought of “we can always talk on MSN… so no need to put you on FB.” Or “FB is more for friends and colleagues, very strange to put family members.”

help!

first

Random facts about my female owner’s first BGR.

They were classmates in junior college.

My female owner liked him the moment she saw him (“her type of guy”). 一见中情

He is shorter than her.

He later became her Onli Fren’s grandson (or something like that).

Because of him, she adopted the practice of eating from a bowl and with a pair of chopsticks... until now.

Because of him, she started to like round things and sometimes emphasises her “o” using capital letters, e.g. rOund, hellO, nOOki.

She loved him more than her second ex.

My female owner never thought that he had feelings for her, although they spent hours after school every day in fast-food restaurants doing homework. How oblivious.

Jealousy was the catalyst that made him ask “will you be my girlfriend?”.

The relationship was the beginning of her spiritual downfall, coz she became too distracted.

They had a rocky relationship. She became depressed. He became withdrawn and isolated. But they still tried to make things work (I wonder why).

They are still on talking terms.

sneezing

My female owner had an “ill-week” which started on Wednesday afternoon when she went to talk to one of her residents. Within 30 minutes, this guy smoked two cigarettes right in her face. That started a sneezing fit that extended till Friday. Yes, she is hyper-sensitive to cigarette smoke. She doesn't mind friends smoking but not in her face!

By Friday, her sneezing fit morphed into a headache that consumed her energy. My female owner hardly gets headaches so this was peculiar and distressing for her. She even thought that she was having a fever as her extremities were icy-cold. Anyway, after taking some panadols, my female owner was knocked out on the bed for a few hours before going for bible study.

During bible study, her sneezing fit got worse and she started to get a blocked nose which made her breathing difficult. Her throat also became sore from the sneezing and she developed a dry cough.

Hopefully she gets better over the weekend as she has to submit two assignments shortly.

self

Do you know who you are? Do you know what you like and what you don’t? What makes you happy and what makes you sad? What your personality is? What kind of people do you get along well with? Do you know why you make certain decisions or what motivates you to do/ not do certain things?

A while back, my female owner realised that she doesn’t really have a strong sense of self. Passive by nature, she has been accommodating to people’s preferences and inclinations. Hence, she tended to go along with the flow so that consensus can be reached faster, or as the cross-cultural psychologist would say, highly collectivist in nature. She lost herself after years of living this way.

Didn’t help that she has a domineering and over-protective mother who made as many decisions as possible for her. Even the portion of noodles (not instant noodle) for meals! To the point that if she had to make a bowl of noodle for herself, my female owner didn’t know how much to take for herself, coz her mother had been deciding how much was enough for her all along!

Oh well.. my female owner has been stuck in memories. She had been very self-focused as well. “I am fat”, “I am a dodgy psychologist”, "I am so useless... still using my mum's money at my age", "I have no friends" (???), “I used to be this”, “How I wish I am that”, “If I could relive my life again, I would…”, etc..

She has been reading a few books recently and one of them was talking about being self-centred. My female owner never saw herself as being self-centred (coz she would willingly give up what she wants so that people could get what they want). But now, she realised that she had been centring her thoughts and energy on herself. That’s self-centredness too. So, she has resolved to be more God-centred and if those ruminative thoughts come round, she will replace them with “I am a child of God”. There, she found her self-identity. Being fat is no longer her self-identity.

accident

My female owner was involved in a 4-vehicle pile-up accident just now, on her way back from a church event. The 4th (taxi) driver hit the 3rd car which hit the car she was in, and then her car hit the first car.

Although no one was injured, the unexpected turn of events left her shaken and stunned.

The heart-warming thing was that some church people who were driving by, on their way home stopped to check if my female owner and her friends were ok. One of them even sent home the three girls who were in the backseat. My female owner chose to stay behind to support the driver. Other church members soon arrived to provide support and care. Some also called my female owner to ask about her. Such strong community spirit.

My female owner needs time to process this event. She is still in shock.

brains

My female owner has been thinking a lot recently. She just cannot work out some things while at the same time, other stuff caught her by surprise (and she can’t work them out either).

Anyway, speaking of brains… she stopped at Goldcoast over the weekend to buy bottles of Salmon Oil from the chemist for her family. They have been taking these health supplements to manage their chronic illnesses. It seems like Salmon Oil is good for the heart, cholesterol level, cognitive function and memory. My female owner was tempted to use one bottle for herself to boost her brain power. She pinpoints her decline in cognitive functioning to the following: drinking, aging and lack of fish in her diet (too expensive, she says).

However, my female owner then decided that her brains can wait (hmm.. I see this as a clear sign of cognitive impairment: not being able to prioritise what is most important and getting distracted by peripherals). She chose to get a bottle of Glucosamine instead. Apparently, it helps to:

• Relieve the pain caused by osteoarthritis
• Increase joint mobility and reduce joint stiffness
• Reduce joint inflammation and swelling
• Reduce cartilage wear
• Protect from deterioration of joint damage in osteoarthritis

Yes, she wants to do something about her dodgy knee before it gets too late and she ends up limping all her life. Ah, the perils of aging, random taste-buds and uncontrolled weight-gain.

churn

For a large part of this semester, my female owner struggled with emptiness and disengaged from her coursework. Maybe it is burnout from her gruelling lifestyle last year. Out of the three courses she is taking, she is only enjoying one of it (health psychology). She has issues with the counselling module (on domestic violence) and her externship. I think as you get older, you get more fussy and demanding about getting quality service.

Anyway, her to-do list for her modules is relatively short, compared to last year’s.

• Three essays (one submitted)
• One exam
• Folio/ paperwork/ record-keeping/ general reading for the externship (similar to last year’s internships).

There are only four more weeks till the end of semester (2/3 down!) and yes, the time has come for my female owner to pull up her socks and start to churn out those papers for submission. A painful, agonising and time-consuming exercise. A necessary evil, I suppose, in order to graduate...

Quick quick finish and quick quick come back!

The Mom Song--- With Lyrics

Something which was screened in church today. Really funnie. Wonder if my female owner would be like that if she is a mom.

doors

Been exactly a month since God spoke through her ex-leader, to reveal to my female owner that she had locked up some doors in her life, some so tightly that He would like her to open those doors and allow Him to heal her of past hurts. One month on, my female owner has a better idea of what those doors are and have managed to locate some of the keys to unlock those doors.

Over the course of the month, my female owner took several steps to open her heart to God again. She spoke first to her ex-leader who supported her through what he calls her “awwing and hmming”. The prayers he made for her soothed the tempest within her and opened up some spiritual blockage. Moving on, she shared some bits with her Functional and Potahto Frens who responded with much appreciated cyber-support. Despite her reluctance, my female owner then went on to set an appointment to with Counsellor, someone with whom she has no personal relationship with (issues of trust screaming out loud) and dutifully met up with her. My female owner posed some theological questions to Counsellor. Her responses opened up my female owner’s spiritual eyes and she started to see things through God’s heart. Counsellor asked her to write down her convictions about who God is to her before the next session. Doing that exercise was painful for my female owner and she was shocked by the answers she came up with. So shocked that she cried even. My female owner never thought she would do it, but she also opened up to I-Fren who already intuitively knew her issues. Was good coz she had a good cry over selective aspects which she had never spoken about.

Such an eventful month for my female owner. Her thoughts are still muddled up but there is greater clarity. The internal pressure that has built up within her is slowly being released as she spends more time in prayer and reading the Bible and as God brings different individuals into her life to support her.

intense

My female owner has been pretty occupied lately, with her assignment deadlines coming up and her Second Onli Fren’s boyfriend being in town. Not to mention, she is putting in more time and effort to socialise with her bible study friends and praying/ reading the Bible more. Yes, no time for exercise!

Been an emotional and thought-provoking weekend for her. It started with the counselling session she had with someone from church (let’s call her Counsellor) through to Saturday where she went for a road-trip to Byron Bay (2 hour drive away.. in New South Wales actually) and God spoke to her through a rainbow and right up to Sunday night, where she had an impromptu catch-up session with her I-Fren. She had intense moments. Questions which bug her for years are being answered, not in a direct way but with answers which give her a peace of mind. Emotions bottled up for years were released openly and safely.

The beauty of retrospection is that you see how things connect. My female owner is beginning to see how the foundation that God started laying last year through different people and incidents helped her to be more receptive to the plans He has in store for her. Only now, my female owner sees how God used different individuals to carry the same message to my female owner (yes, she’s that kind of person who needs to be persuaded a few times before agreeing to trying something outside of her comfort zone).

There is no denying that God is a patient God. He prompts and He urges but never forces you to do anything you are not ready to. All this while, God has been waiting for my female owner to be ready and willing to re-dedicate her life to Him. My female owner has (happily) taken the first few steps of faith and slowly but surely, she will see Him moving in her life. The journey has just started.

service

My female owner has been playing her flute more often these days (thank God she’s out of range of the Balcony!). She only plays the flute during the day and when no one is at home. That’s a small window of opportunity isn’t it?

Anyway, she was just surfing the internet when she chanced upon an Australian website for Flutes and Flutists. How apt, coz she has been wondering whether it is time to service her $3000 (?!?!) flute (like cars, instruments also need to be serviced regularly) and if yes, where she could do it. The company claims to be “Australasia's leading specialist flute supplier, offering a large range of student, intermediate and professional flutes. It also offers a leading edge flute repair service, all under the direction of David Leviston.”

For her flute, which is a Yamaha 500-series and classified as a”handfinished flute”, a general service will cost $340, repeat service, $280 and overhaul, $995. Quite exhorbitant prices, considering that she once sent in an intermediate model for servicing (or was it an overhaul?) in Singapore and the bill came up to $200+.

Whats in a service?
Replace missing corks and felts,replace up to 4 pads, general pad work& shimming,clean polish oil adjust, remove minor dents, 3 month warranty

Whats in an Overhaul?
Replace all corks & felts, remove scratches & dents, complete polish of body & keys, clean oil adjust, remove wear from mechanism 6 month warranty

Hmmm.. like it or not, the flute is assessed to be still in good condition..

out

My female owner is meeting the person whom she is supposed to get help from in less than an hour’s time. Yah, after a long-winded attempt to set an appointment, the two of them finally arranged to meet today at my female owner’s house.

When the appointment was settled last week, my female owner sent an email to her leader, requesting that he prays also that her house-mates would not be home (As you may already know, Female Housemate tended to stay home these days, leaving my female owner feeling frustrated).

On her own, my female owner made some half-hearted prayer for Female Housemate to be out of the house today. I say it is half-hearted, coz my female owner was already mentally prepared for Female Housemate to be home. Anyway, last night, my female owner informed her that she would be having a friend over for lunch and asked if Female Housemate would like to join them for lunch.

Her reply was “Oh, I will be going to school tomorrow, I’ve already cooked our lunches.” Amazing coz she is usually home during lunch-time.

And indeed, this morning, she was out of the house by 0900hr. My female owner is amazed at how God would answer her simple prayer.

hard

My female owner says that it is harder for a person who has low morale to work than a person who is physically ill. In a split-second decision made last night, she decided to call in sick at her placement today. Not the most glamorous thing to be declaring but my female owner just couldn’t face another day of wandering around and trying to make herself believe that she is doing psychological work. Like what Onli Fren says (after her initial shock, and possibly disapproval), if skipping one day can boost her morale, then why not? For the longer good.

This is also in line with my female owner's decision to work smart rather than work hard. So, rather than clock long hours doing work (i.e. "work hard"), she is trying to strategise and rearrange her work so that she can achieve more in a shorter time. Not sure how working smart is connected to skipping work, but apparently, my female owner thinks that going to work today is a waste of time as she can make up the missed "clinical hours" another time by clocking more hours within a day. Something like that.

And so, my female owner woke up today feeling like a little caged bird being set free for a day. She spent the day working on her 3000-word assignment on domestic violence and sneaked in a 2-hour break to try out a curry veggies recipe. Yes, no cheat sauce involved. She’s reportedly quite pleased with the outcome.

unexpected

My female owner met up with an unexpected person from Singapore yesterday night. Her Second Onli Fren’s boyfriend! Yeah, he is now in Brisbane for business and was under instructions from Second Onli Fren to pass a gift she bought from Bali to my female owner. In true-blue Second Onli Fren's style, she only told my female owner that he was coming on the very day of his arrival.

Check it out! So sweet of her eh. Yeah, the picture fits nicely onto the existing nail in her wall, and finds a footing at the adjacent wall!

Yah, I know that turtle looks like me.

Anyway, my female owner said that she enjoyed the chat with the boyfriend. They were later joined by one of her church friends who happened to be at the same restaurant. In case you are wondering, what a coincidence! You need to realise that Brisbane is so small and sedated that there are limited choices for eateries which remain open after 2200hr.

My female owner couldn’t help but wish that her Second Onli Fren had came along for the trip. Would have been so much fun (and distraction!).

online

Been a while since I heard my female owner on video-cam. Her (partial) abstinence from MSN has been in effect since she came back from Melbourne and her cyber absence, noted by a few people. For example, the first time she appeared online after a few days, one of her friends, who was actually invisible, immediately sent a message “you are finally online!” Wahaha. Hmmm… The MSN season of her life seems to be over…

solitude

After three weekends of procrastination, my female owner finally brought herself to school to clock some hours for her paid work (hmm… sounds like my female owner has been “clocking hours” for various segments of her life).

She succeeded in spending the day entering data and organising the data files. Free from gastronomical distractions and resources, she finds that she is more productive in her humble office in school.

Also, the office offers her solitude. For some reason, her housemates (or at least the wife) are at home more often than before. Although they leave her alone, she still feels stifled, knowing that there is a high chance that she needs to make small talk with them. Already she doesn't like to make small talk. What more, if she has to do it in Mandarin! Plain torture.

Yes, still the anti-social her. Gotta accept her for the way she is.

pandemonium

My female owner finally recuperated from her accumulated sleep debt. Or at least, she “clocked the hours”. That’s why I can get some updates from her.

She says that she is fitting in better with her bible study group friends. For one, she introduced the art of impromptu mass-emailing and replying. This is a practice common in Singapore among close colleagues and friends. Or at least among her Impromptu Frens. One person sends an email regarding something. Someone (the catalyst) replies with a not-so-relevant comment. The ball of random replies starts to roll and the fun starts.

Apparently, her friends have never done such things before and they are highly amused by firstly, the mountain of emails which flooded their inbox and secondly, the witty correspondence. Imagine the pandemonium as 20 people try to add their 2-cents worth over email.

The group also went out for supper last night after bible study. Supper in Brisbane takes a different form because not many places are open after 2200hr. They ended up drinking bubble tea. Sitting around a small table, they spontaneously churned out topics to laugh and tease one another about. Been a super long time since my female owner had this type of brainless fun and laughter. Good for her.

ageing

With her 30th birthday just round the corner (up to you to picture how big that corner is), my female owner feels old and tired. She notices that her body and mind being less vibrant as before. Processing speed slows down. Memory becomes unreliable. Concepts float over her. Skin wrinkles. Body takes longer to recover. Fats pile on quicker than a Singaporean digging in at a buffet table – a lump of lard she calls herself.

Really, once she believed she would be forever young. She took it for granted that her body and mind would continue working as efficiently as how she had known them to function in her prime, her teenage years. Now reality hits home and ageing is the new game she has to play.

Could it be the effect of working in an aged care home? By the way, her charming resident passed away yesterday and my female owner is upset with the sudden turn of events. She was not mentally prepared for deaths.