My female owner is feeling more stressed and anxious lately. It is strange, coz technically, her coursework is completed and she has lesser deadlines to meet now. But it seems like the reduction in deadlines is making her feel anxious and stressed. The feeling she is currently nursing is one of she should be completing something even though there are no immediate or urgent deadlines to meet.
Also, because it’s end of semester, my female owner wants to spend more time with her friends (you know, get a life, have a life concept?!). While she is happy doing that, there is still this big nag at the back of her mind that she could be spending the time doing her work. Although my female owner refuses to be a slave to her work, her work conscience screams out so loudly at her, it makes her feel anxious, worried and upset.
My female owner realises that she is a good starter, sustainer… but a poor finisher. To her, being a poor finisher of tasks and goals is as good as not starting, since you don’t accomplish what you set out to do. A good example is the way she exercises. She starts ok, goes on without stopping (if possible) but slows down at the end, precisely because she is reaching the end and knows that the end is within reach.
Oh dear.. I think the pre-going home jitters is getting to her. So many things to do, in so little time. Or maybe she just needs some yummy chocolate chip cookies!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
flown
My female owner is coming home! Yay! Bring out the balloons (opps, maybe not, she’s scared of them!). Bring out the champagne and wings!
Anyway, my female owner had lunch with a Singaporean friend whom she knew only because she was going to Brisbane. The friend also went to Brisbane to do a postgrad in mental health. The difference is that, this friend is going home for good in two days time! Her programme is markedly shorter (1.5 years), with the third being long-distance learning.
My female owner was confronted with how quickly time had flown. It seemed like just yesterday (Feb) when they first met as fellow Singaporeans in big, unfamiliar Brisbane. Memories of times spent together flooded her mind - the meals they had when they were not too busy to meet up; the different places they explored together; the snacks they gave each other when they met; the support and connection they had, simply by being in the same predicament, and same age etc. All of a sudden, it was time to say goodbye to a fellow comrade (ok, I’m being a bit too dramatic here). It's just unbelieveable, how quickly time flew by... The ups and downs the friend experienced are finally over (sort-of).
My female owner also couldn’t help but wonder how she would feel when it is time for her to bid farewell to Brisbane.
Cheers to the good memories!
Anyway, my female owner had lunch with a Singaporean friend whom she knew only because she was going to Brisbane. The friend also went to Brisbane to do a postgrad in mental health. The difference is that, this friend is going home for good in two days time! Her programme is markedly shorter (1.5 years), with the third being long-distance learning.
My female owner was confronted with how quickly time had flown. It seemed like just yesterday (Feb) when they first met as fellow Singaporeans in big, unfamiliar Brisbane. Memories of times spent together flooded her mind - the meals they had when they were not too busy to meet up; the different places they explored together; the snacks they gave each other when they met; the support and connection they had, simply by being in the same predicament, and same age etc. All of a sudden, it was time to say goodbye to a fellow comrade (ok, I’m being a bit too dramatic here). It's just unbelieveable, how quickly time flew by... The ups and downs the friend experienced are finally over (sort-of).
My female owner also couldn’t help but wonder how she would feel when it is time for her to bid farewell to Brisbane.
Cheers to the good memories!
suppressed
My female owner had an unexpected MSN chat a few nights ago with a fellow animal lover who had been a tremendous source of help when she was down and out because of, humph, me!
Anyway, talking to him, my female owner realised that she had suppressed so many unhappy memories and experiences of that period, to the point that she couldn’t remember the people who were in her team during the deployment, the kind of fun (or anguish) they had as a team, the specific episodes that “made her face turn black”, the stupid decisions that she had to implement etc.
She only remembered global things – that I fell sick (and that she had so many friends who came round to support her), that she was activated at night and left pretty much in the lurch to kick in crisis intervention for a distraught family and groups of colleagues, that she fell out with her bosses over differences in ethical views, that the period was the last straw that broke her back and caused her to say no to her organisation.
Anyway, talking to him, my female owner realised that she had suppressed so many unhappy memories and experiences of that period, to the point that she couldn’t remember the people who were in her team during the deployment, the kind of fun (or anguish) they had as a team, the specific episodes that “made her face turn black”, the stupid decisions that she had to implement etc.
She only remembered global things – that I fell sick (and that she had so many friends who came round to support her), that she was activated at night and left pretty much in the lurch to kick in crisis intervention for a distraught family and groups of colleagues, that she fell out with her bosses over differences in ethical views, that the period was the last straw that broke her back and caused her to say no to her organisation.
bonds
My female owner attended her bible study farewell party today. Her bible study is going to split into two groups in the new year – the working people and the students. Although my female owner is technically a student, she has asked to move to the working group. There are many reasons for that decision which I won’t go into. Takes too long and I wanna sleep early tonight. It’s the weekend you know.
Her bible study group has been a tremendous source of support and stability for my female owner. Although she is always gripping about how young they are, or rather, how conscious she is of the huge age-gap between them and her (and hence, the difference in frequency, interests and needs), she knows that at the end of the day, the group had blessed her more ways than she had blessed them.
Yet, at the same time, she has not developed a strong enough bond to the group. So even though the group is going to split, she doesn’t feel a great sense of loss or reluctance. To her, it is like another stage of life where everyone moves on but still remains largely as friends (or like what some might say, people who leave footprints in your life).
Perhaps 8 months is really too short to feel sad about such things. After all, my female owner and Potahto knew each other as colleagues for more than a year, before they started getting close. Some bonds just need time to develop.
Her bible study group has been a tremendous source of support and stability for my female owner. Although she is always gripping about how young they are, or rather, how conscious she is of the huge age-gap between them and her (and hence, the difference in frequency, interests and needs), she knows that at the end of the day, the group had blessed her more ways than she had blessed them.
Yet, at the same time, she has not developed a strong enough bond to the group. So even though the group is going to split, she doesn’t feel a great sense of loss or reluctance. To her, it is like another stage of life where everyone moves on but still remains largely as friends (or like what some might say, people who leave footprints in your life).
Perhaps 8 months is really too short to feel sad about such things. After all, my female owner and Potahto knew each other as colleagues for more than a year, before they started getting close. Some bonds just need time to develop.
deficits
My female owner has complaints of memory deficits and cognitive blurring.
She absolutely cannot remember several recent past events. It is like things go by her in a flash and even when she try to recall whether she has done certain things, she can’t even find a trigger to help her trace back.
Next, her short-term memory is malfunctioning too. She would set the water to boil on the stove but forget all about it as soon as she goes to her room. By the time she remembers, half the water would have evaporated or her innocent housemates would have switched off the stove for her.
Sometimes she says things in auto pilot, without really processing her thoughts. So things go by, without her really knowing what’s happening. She also finds that her processing speed is slowing (i.e. she is not as quick-thinking or as bright as before).
She described herself as being caught in a big bubble that dulls her hearing, dims her sight and dampens her cognitive functioning.
She absolutely cannot remember several recent past events. It is like things go by her in a flash and even when she try to recall whether she has done certain things, she can’t even find a trigger to help her trace back.
Next, her short-term memory is malfunctioning too. She would set the water to boil on the stove but forget all about it as soon as she goes to her room. By the time she remembers, half the water would have evaporated or her innocent housemates would have switched off the stove for her.
Sometimes she says things in auto pilot, without really processing her thoughts. So things go by, without her really knowing what’s happening. She also finds that her processing speed is slowing (i.e. she is not as quick-thinking or as bright as before).
She described herself as being caught in a big bubble that dulls her hearing, dims her sight and dampens her cognitive functioning.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
compounded
My female owner has been feeling down since yesterday. It all started with the meeting with her research supervisor which felt like all doom and gloom for her.
Come today, she hadn’t resolved the issues he raised during the meeting (coz she didn’t do anything to resolve them after the meeting). However, she received her grade for the Research Methodology course. This was the awful paper she submitted a few weeks ago.
This is where things get complicated (for me). My female owner expected that she might get a “6” (distinction) and in worst case, a “5”. So a “7” (high distinction) is a bonus. When she found out that as predicted, she got a “6”, she became upset that she got a “6”!
And now, she is upset that she is upset that she got a 6, coz she feels that this is really just a small issue, in the larger scheme of things. But hey, if her life had revolved only around school, won't that make that 6 a bigger than usual issue?
She figured that the 6 simply compounded the sunken feeling she had yesterday about her research.
Come today, she hadn’t resolved the issues he raised during the meeting (coz she didn’t do anything to resolve them after the meeting). However, she received her grade for the Research Methodology course. This was the awful paper she submitted a few weeks ago.
This is where things get complicated (for me). My female owner expected that she might get a “6” (distinction) and in worst case, a “5”. So a “7” (high distinction) is a bonus. When she found out that as predicted, she got a “6”, she became upset that she got a “6”!
And now, she is upset that she is upset that she got a 6, coz she feels that this is really just a small issue, in the larger scheme of things. But hey, if her life had revolved only around school, won't that make that 6 a bigger than usual issue?
She figured that the 6 simply compounded the sunken feeling she had yesterday about her research.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
slow life
My female owner had a pleasant cyber surprise when Potahto asked her, somewhat sheepishly, whether my female owner had received a package from her. This was because my female owner recently received something from the LARS couple and Potahto was wondering if her package (which she sent much earlier) made it to Brisbane.
Quite obviously not. Thankfully, Potahto had the foresight to take a photo of the surprise and what a surprise it was!
Check it out! The turtle was created with this blog in mind.
Quite obviously not. Thankfully, Potahto had the foresight to take a photo of the surprise and what a surprise it was!
Check it out! The turtle was created with this blog in mind.
Sad to say, its whereabouts is in question... Hopefully it will make it to my female owner's home before she leaves for Singapore!
Monday, November 10, 2008
grace
My female owner is going to sit for her one and only written examination tomorrow. Today has been a day where she was bombarded left right centre with God’s grace.
First, her Potahto Fren (haven’t been writing about her for a long time) pointed her into the direction of a potential part-time job which she can fit into her schedule while she is back in Singapore (eh, I thought my female owner is supposed to be on holiday!). The person liaising with my female owner turned out to be a previous intern at her former workplace! Although it is not certain if she’ll get the job, my female owner is thankful for the opportunity. At least there is hope, as she puts it.
Second, she had a nice chat with Mr Squabbles who shared about Jesus being one's sole focus in life (sounds so goody-two-shoes suddenly!).
Third, her mother emailed her to say that God led her to attend a talk on Lasik (which soothed her anxiety) and to speak to an Assoc Prof about it. This in turn opened the way for my female owner to undergo Lasik during the short time she is back in Singapore and yet, get follow-up sessions in Australia!
Fourth, although her night client seemed like she was not going to cancel her appointment, she had to in the end (God answered my female owner’s desperate prayers). This allowed my female owner to stay home and have more time to revise for her examination.
Fifth, she received two things in the mail. A VCD on aikido sent by the LARS couple weeks ago (tsk tsk to the snail mail, but always nice to get something from back home) and a Executive Dean’s Commendation congratulating her for her good results last semester. Arriving on the eve of her examination, the latter made it in the nick of time to remind my female owner not to rest on her laurels. It also reminded her of God’s grace and provision, shining through her weaknesses and lack (i.e. her poor memory, long break from studying, battles with home-sickness and other issues).
Cheers!
First, her Potahto Fren (haven’t been writing about her for a long time) pointed her into the direction of a potential part-time job which she can fit into her schedule while she is back in Singapore (eh, I thought my female owner is supposed to be on holiday!). The person liaising with my female owner turned out to be a previous intern at her former workplace! Although it is not certain if she’ll get the job, my female owner is thankful for the opportunity. At least there is hope, as she puts it.
Second, she had a nice chat with Mr Squabbles who shared about Jesus being one's sole focus in life (sounds so goody-two-shoes suddenly!).
Third, her mother emailed her to say that God led her to attend a talk on Lasik (which soothed her anxiety) and to speak to an Assoc Prof about it. This in turn opened the way for my female owner to undergo Lasik during the short time she is back in Singapore and yet, get follow-up sessions in Australia!
Fourth, although her night client seemed like she was not going to cancel her appointment, she had to in the end (God answered my female owner’s desperate prayers). This allowed my female owner to stay home and have more time to revise for her examination.
Fifth, she received two things in the mail. A VCD on aikido sent by the LARS couple weeks ago (tsk tsk to the snail mail, but always nice to get something from back home) and a Executive Dean’s Commendation congratulating her for her good results last semester. Arriving on the eve of her examination, the latter made it in the nick of time to remind my female owner not to rest on her laurels. It also reminded her of God’s grace and provision, shining through her weaknesses and lack (i.e. her poor memory, long break from studying, battles with home-sickness and other issues).
Cheers!
Sunday, November 09, 2008
gem
My female owner’s long-time Couple Fren finally spoke to her on MSN. According to my female owner, it must have been the first time since she returned to Brisbane that they chatted! That’s like 3.5 months of non-contact.
Nonetheless, my female owner felt that they have reached a stage where they are secure in the strength of their friendship. Hence, long silences do not represent a drifting apart of their emotional ties. Rather, they signal the confidence both parties have in each other, knowing that they can depend on each other when the situation calls for it.
Hmm.. Old friends are like gems… They add sparkle to your life.
Nonetheless, my female owner felt that they have reached a stage where they are secure in the strength of their friendship. Hence, long silences do not represent a drifting apart of their emotional ties. Rather, they signal the confidence both parties have in each other, knowing that they can depend on each other when the situation calls for it.
Hmm.. Old friends are like gems… They add sparkle to your life.
testimony
My female owner had a recent experience of being used by God to speak to others.
You see, she was scheduled to share a testimony in her bible study group last Friday. Last Sunday, when she found out that she had to share a testimony, her first reaction was reluctance (because she is anti-social and don’t like to talk about personal issues) and then, bo-pian, knowing that she has no way out, she asked God what she should share.
God told her to share about how He brought her through the healing process from her previous BGR and the biblical lessons she learnt. My female owner was lagi more reluctant to talk about that and she cried (quietly) as she wrestled with God about this. And she avoided preparing for testimony for the whole week, hoping that she might find something else to talk about.
Come Friday, she conceded that she should obey God and at 1800hr, started to organise her thoughts (bible study starts at 1900hr). My female owner couldn’t get the words to flow smoothly and in her struggle, she actually teared. She finally left it half worked out because she felt God saying that He would help her find the words when it was time to share.
And so, she went ahead with the testimony during bible study, saying upfront that she was not willing to share this! Anyway, by the end of bible study, two people came up to her to share about their similar experiences while two others told her that it was a powerful testimony. My female owner was truly amazed at the response.
One of them spoke to her again today and told her that while she was sharing, he felt God’s presence very strongly and that God was speaking directly at him. While his spiritual mentor had not been able to persuade him on certain issues, my female owner’s testimony convicted his heart and caused him to start doing certain things.
Ah, the power of obedience to God. My female owner was stunned at how God had used her (unknowingly, coz she didn’t think that anyone would be impacted by her testimony).
You see, she was scheduled to share a testimony in her bible study group last Friday. Last Sunday, when she found out that she had to share a testimony, her first reaction was reluctance (because she is anti-social and don’t like to talk about personal issues) and then, bo-pian, knowing that she has no way out, she asked God what she should share.
God told her to share about how He brought her through the healing process from her previous BGR and the biblical lessons she learnt. My female owner was lagi more reluctant to talk about that and she cried (quietly) as she wrestled with God about this. And she avoided preparing for testimony for the whole week, hoping that she might find something else to talk about.
Come Friday, she conceded that she should obey God and at 1800hr, started to organise her thoughts (bible study starts at 1900hr). My female owner couldn’t get the words to flow smoothly and in her struggle, she actually teared. She finally left it half worked out because she felt God saying that He would help her find the words when it was time to share.
And so, she went ahead with the testimony during bible study, saying upfront that she was not willing to share this! Anyway, by the end of bible study, two people came up to her to share about their similar experiences while two others told her that it was a powerful testimony. My female owner was truly amazed at the response.
One of them spoke to her again today and told her that while she was sharing, he felt God’s presence very strongly and that God was speaking directly at him. While his spiritual mentor had not been able to persuade him on certain issues, my female owner’s testimony convicted his heart and caused him to start doing certain things.
Ah, the power of obedience to God. My female owner was stunned at how God had used her (unknowingly, coz she didn’t think that anyone would be impacted by her testimony).
Saturday, November 08, 2008
memories
I was going to sleep when I realised that today is a significant day… sort of. One year ago on this day, my female owner had a video-conferencing interview with her dream school. That day changed the trajectory of her life (and us turtles) forever, as she did well enough to pass the interview.
One year passes by so quickly.
One thousand memories later, she’s in the midst of living a life that she had been dreaming of, for more than five years.
Although she doesn’t know where she is headed to after she graduates, my female owner realises that the journey is more exciting than the destination. Hence, she is going to create thousands of thousands memories during this journey.
Stay tuned.
One year passes by so quickly.
One thousand memories later, she’s in the midst of living a life that she had been dreaming of, for more than five years.
Although she doesn’t know where she is headed to after she graduates, my female owner realises that the journey is more exciting than the destination. Hence, she is going to create thousands of thousands memories during this journey.
Stay tuned.
alone
My female owner enjoyed herself yesterday, being at home and studying. She is doing it again today. Her usually noisy and crowded house is unusually quiet today, with no one at home except her. The anti-social side of her is very contended to be left alone. Even in Singapore, she was always happy when she was alone at home (we turtles are always home, but we don’t make a lot of noise) and even more so, when her parents were away for holidays. Just a sense of serenity and tranquillity that doesn’t come often for her.
My female owner wonders how she is going to fund the next three months of her life. Her tutor pay stops this week, meaning that from next week onwards, she has to once again, rely on her mother’s financial support for her daily expenses/rent/misc. Credit to her, my female owner actually got through the entire semester without using her mother’s money.
Going back to Singapore, she has absolutely no money to call her own (is the government going to hand out anymore money?!). She had given her mother all her money when she was preparing to go over to Brisbane earlier this year. Everything she spends will therefore be out of a goodwill fund from her mother. That means that she cannot afford to splurge or indulge (maybe this will help her stay out of trouble. Haha!) To support herself and maintain some sense of independence, my female owner doesn’t mind doing some part-time work to tide over for the period she will be in Singapore. Anyone got any lobang? I need to advertise, coz she needs money to stock up on our food too! (This is called forward planning.)
Ah, I suppose this would be a nice time to have a boyfriend…
My female owner wonders how she is going to fund the next three months of her life. Her tutor pay stops this week, meaning that from next week onwards, she has to once again, rely on her mother’s financial support for her daily expenses/rent/misc. Credit to her, my female owner actually got through the entire semester without using her mother’s money.
Going back to Singapore, she has absolutely no money to call her own (is the government going to hand out anymore money?!). She had given her mother all her money when she was preparing to go over to Brisbane earlier this year. Everything she spends will therefore be out of a goodwill fund from her mother. That means that she cannot afford to splurge or indulge (maybe this will help her stay out of trouble. Haha!) To support herself and maintain some sense of independence, my female owner doesn’t mind doing some part-time work to tide over for the period she will be in Singapore. Anyone got any lobang? I need to advertise, coz she needs money to stock up on our food too! (This is called forward planning.)
Ah, I suppose this would be a nice time to have a boyfriend…
Friday, November 07, 2008
skip
My female owner finally started studying for her examination next week. This is probably the first time that she has been so last minute in her preparation. What she lacks in terms of natural ability, she has always tried to make up for it by putting in extra effort to the point of diminishing returns. Meaning that the outcomes she get sometimes do not commensurate with the amount of effort/ sacrifice she puts in.
A very good example would be during her junior college days when she struggled with every single subject she took. Almost everyday, she studied with her then-boyfriend at fast food joints. She remembered times when she would prepare for a test the next day while he would be doing a tutorial that was long overdue. And he would end up doing well for the test while she barely passed.
Such is the difference between natural ability and man-made efforts.
Anyway, she received the results for her written assignments for the module she is studying for today. (These were the assignments which caused her a great deal of stress a few weeks ago, because the module is double-weighted). While she didn'd do too badly as compared to others in the class, she lost enough marks to disqualify herself for a "7". She also realised that even without going for the examination, she would get a "4" for the module and still maintain a GPA of above 5.5.
Ah, maybe she should just skip the examination and move on with life.
A very good example would be during her junior college days when she struggled with every single subject she took. Almost everyday, she studied with her then-boyfriend at fast food joints. She remembered times when she would prepare for a test the next day while he would be doing a tutorial that was long overdue. And he would end up doing well for the test while she barely passed.
Such is the difference between natural ability and man-made efforts.
Anyway, she received the results for her written assignments for the module she is studying for today. (These were the assignments which caused her a great deal of stress a few weeks ago, because the module is double-weighted). While she didn'd do too badly as compared to others in the class, she lost enough marks to disqualify herself for a "7". She also realised that even without going for the examination, she would get a "4" for the module and still maintain a GPA of above 5.5.
Ah, maybe she should just skip the examination and move on with life.
anger
Over the years, I have seen how my female owner struggle with intense negative emotions – anger, depression and stress. Sometimes anxiety. In such times, using her emotions to guide her actions tended to cause her to be rash and do things on impulse (only to regret later).
Both my female owner and I have learnt that growing older does NOT protect one from behaving like a teenager. Neither does pursuing a postgrad in psychology.
After a long time of not feeling so “intense”, my female owner experienced what she called the “maddest day of her life in Brisbane” today. Cutting a super long story (of grievances short), she was very angry with her second clinical supervisor (Mr Dubious).
She didn’t realise how emotionally aroused she was until her Therapist called her for a random chat (such uncanny timing, given that her Therapist had been MIA for almost a week). Blurting out her anger, my female owner soon found herself in tears over the situation. And shortly after, she was laughing and crying at the same time, much to her confusion (my female owner later found out that she was probably having hypoxia).
My female owner realised that the more she ventilated, the angrier she became. She ended so annoyed that she decided to camp in school to pretend to do some work after her last client appointment ended at 2030. She just didn't want to go home to a house full of people (there are 5 other people in her house now) and force herself to make small talk when it is not in her nature to do so. She just wanted to be herself (which is not talking to anyone if she doesn't want to).
While her Intuitive Fren (who spent some time dissecting her emo outburst) felt that it was odd of her to do that ("if you can only be yourself when you are alone, then how would people know the real you?"), her Onli Fren (who also tried to hear her out despite her competing priority) felt that it was perfectly understandable ("this is the -female owner's name- I know!"). The MSN exchanges were helpful in reducing her angst to a more acceptable level.
To top the night off, her Impromptu Frens called her for a chat. Again, another round robin catch-up with everyone in the group.
How to stay upset, when there are so many friends to lift your spirits??
Both my female owner and I have learnt that growing older does NOT protect one from behaving like a teenager. Neither does pursuing a postgrad in psychology.
After a long time of not feeling so “intense”, my female owner experienced what she called the “maddest day of her life in Brisbane” today. Cutting a super long story (of grievances short), she was very angry with her second clinical supervisor (Mr Dubious).
She didn’t realise how emotionally aroused she was until her Therapist called her for a random chat (such uncanny timing, given that her Therapist had been MIA for almost a week). Blurting out her anger, my female owner soon found herself in tears over the situation. And shortly after, she was laughing and crying at the same time, much to her confusion (my female owner later found out that she was probably having hypoxia).
My female owner realised that the more she ventilated, the angrier she became. She ended so annoyed that she decided to camp in school to pretend to do some work after her last client appointment ended at 2030. She just didn't want to go home to a house full of people (there are 5 other people in her house now) and force herself to make small talk when it is not in her nature to do so. She just wanted to be herself (which is not talking to anyone if she doesn't want to).
While her Intuitive Fren (who spent some time dissecting her emo outburst) felt that it was odd of her to do that ("if you can only be yourself when you are alone, then how would people know the real you?"), her Onli Fren (who also tried to hear her out despite her competing priority) felt that it was perfectly understandable ("this is the -female owner's name- I know!"). The MSN exchanges were helpful in reducing her angst to a more acceptable level.
To top the night off, her Impromptu Frens called her for a chat. Again, another round robin catch-up with everyone in the group.
How to stay upset, when there are so many friends to lift your spirits??
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
blonde
My female owner is very peeved with her second supervisor. So peeved, she is seething with anger inside her, but with the picture of calm on the outside.
Given that he is one of her first contact with a male Aussie blonde, my female owner has almost sworn off Aussie guys.
All guys are bad. ALL. GUYS. ARE. BAD.
Includes everyone, of the male species, still true in the present, not an historical fact, that they are NOT good.
Okay, I think she is catastrophising and really mad.
Given that he is one of her first contact with a male Aussie blonde, my female owner has almost sworn off Aussie guys.
All guys are bad. ALL. GUYS. ARE. BAD.
Includes everyone, of the male species, still true in the present, not an historical fact, that they are NOT good.
Okay, I think she is catastrophising and really mad.
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
bujinkan
My female owner finally had a Monday night free and she joined a couple of her friends for street-fighting training. Yes, you read it right. She found some street-fighting kakis to sweat her fats away (and possibly to damage her knee further).
The class had about 8 students and one instructor and training was conducted in an open grassland under the moonlight. A short distance away from that grassland were some sheep and cows (some of my female owner’s favourite animals). How romantic and rustic! Almost everyone wore black, adding to the flavour of street-fighting training (think ninjas in training!).
My female owner later found out that she was learning the art of bujinkan, a lesser known Japanese martial art. She found the style was very different from aikido, being more aggressive, involving kicks and opposing the opponent’s attack/ strength, rather than flowing with it. My female owner definitely had fun tumbling around last night (I told you she is trying to lead a more “normal” life now).
The only thing was that she ended up with some skin rash on her elbow and her ankle today.. courtesy of her ambivalent allergy to grass.
The class had about 8 students and one instructor and training was conducted in an open grassland under the moonlight. A short distance away from that grassland were some sheep and cows (some of my female owner’s favourite animals). How romantic and rustic! Almost everyone wore black, adding to the flavour of street-fighting training (think ninjas in training!).
My female owner later found out that she was learning the art of bujinkan, a lesser known Japanese martial art. She found the style was very different from aikido, being more aggressive, involving kicks and opposing the opponent’s attack/ strength, rather than flowing with it. My female owner definitely had fun tumbling around last night (I told you she is trying to lead a more “normal” life now).
The only thing was that she ended up with some skin rash on her elbow and her ankle today.. courtesy of her ambivalent allergy to grass.
creaks
My female owner has been trying out the strengthening exercises at home and she is happy to note that she is experiencing less pain in her knee now. She still gets the pain when there’s hard impact with the ground (e.g. jogging or running) but thinks that it is lower in intensity. Going up and down gentle slopes is less aching now. She’s not sure if it’s a placebo effect of sorts… you know, like you think you are slimmer just because you ran 2km just now.
The scary thing that came out of the strengthening routine is that she notices that her knee creaks everytime she extends it.. and she can feel things (bones? cartilage?) moving beneath her knee cap. Try to imagine slotting in the wrong key into a key-hole and you can still turn the key but not open the door. It’s that kind of feeling.. strange movements felt and heard in the unseen.
The scary thing that came out of the strengthening routine is that she notices that her knee creaks everytime she extends it.. and she can feel things (bones? cartilage?) moving beneath her knee cap. Try to imagine slotting in the wrong key into a key-hole and you can still turn the key but not open the door. It’s that kind of feeling.. strange movements felt and heard in the unseen.
Monday, November 03, 2008
knee
Wah, two days sped past me! Didn’t realise that I haven’t been updating my Turtle Pad. Ever since upsetting everyone with my accidental escape, I have been trying to lie low.. and not ruffle any more shells. Word has it that my brothers tried to tell my female owner’s father about my escape by hovering near the fencing to grab his attention. Unfortunately, he couldn’t read turtle language well enough to decipher what they were trying to tell him.
Maybe some updates about my female owner. She went walking/ jogging with her housemate today. Didn’t perspire much because they covered a short distance. So when she reached home, she decided to do some of the exercises Mr Physio “prescribed” her (there were 7!!). It was good that her housemate acted as the resistance for one of the exercises. And the housemate did feel the difference between her two legs, with one being more in control than the other.
Ordinarily, my female owner is NOT one to be consistent with exercising or routines. But because Mr Physio took the trouble to go to her house to work out her problem and work through the different exercises with her despite having examinations round the corner, my female owner felt that she cannot 对不起 him. So she decided that she has to do those exercises regularly.
Ah, see how long she can last this time!
Maybe some updates about my female owner. She went walking/ jogging with her housemate today. Didn’t perspire much because they covered a short distance. So when she reached home, she decided to do some of the exercises Mr Physio “prescribed” her (there were 7!!). It was good that her housemate acted as the resistance for one of the exercises. And the housemate did feel the difference between her two legs, with one being more in control than the other.
Ordinarily, my female owner is NOT one to be consistent with exercising or routines. But because Mr Physio took the trouble to go to her house to work out her problem and work through the different exercises with her despite having examinations round the corner, my female owner felt that she cannot 对不起 him. So she decided that she has to do those exercises regularly.
Ah, see how long she can last this time!
Saturday, November 01, 2008
physio
My female owner had a scare last night, because her friend had undergone knee operation. Apparently his knee had been affected through years of martial art, rugby and track. While my female owner cannot claim to have done years of aikido, badminton and jogging, she still identified with the possibility of having to go under the knife to correct her knee problem.
Today, she had an opportunity to ask another physio fren about her knee. Because they had time, Mr Physio (also one of her jogging kakis) was able to spend some time figuring out her knee problem. He diagnosed her problem as m……… Yes. My female owner wasn’t bright enough to remember the condition, or to even write it down. According to him, the lining between the knee joints might have torn because of the high impact activities she used to do.
He also assessed her left leg muscles (specifically the inner thighs) as being weaker than her right leg muscles, and demonstrated some exercises that would help to strengthen those muscles (my female owner was even instructed to write them down) and tone her body (haha!). Happily, he also assured her that operations are not common occurrences.
Ah, for once, my female owner is the client. She had a taste of being questioned about her symptoms (and found that she was not able to express herself clearly), being taught rehabilitation skills (now she understands that value of a therapist doing something alongside with the client), being clueless about what to expect (and so the therapist should be confident and reassuring), receiving a diagnosis (in a layperson point of view), gathering evidence (which convince her of the problem) and even discussing about homework compliance!
Today, she had an opportunity to ask another physio fren about her knee. Because they had time, Mr Physio (also one of her jogging kakis) was able to spend some time figuring out her knee problem. He diagnosed her problem as m……… Yes. My female owner wasn’t bright enough to remember the condition, or to even write it down. According to him, the lining between the knee joints might have torn because of the high impact activities she used to do.
He also assessed her left leg muscles (specifically the inner thighs) as being weaker than her right leg muscles, and demonstrated some exercises that would help to strengthen those muscles (my female owner was even instructed to write them down) and tone her body (haha!). Happily, he also assured her that operations are not common occurrences.
Ah, for once, my female owner is the client. She had a taste of being questioned about her symptoms (and found that she was not able to express herself clearly), being taught rehabilitation skills (now she understands that value of a therapist doing something alongside with the client), being clueless about what to expect (and so the therapist should be confident and reassuring), receiving a diagnosis (in a layperson point of view), gathering evidence (which convince her of the problem) and even discussing about homework compliance!
Friday, October 31, 2008
escape
I think I mentioned once before, that being a driving instructor for decades, my female owner’s father has developed a good and strong heart to deal with shocks and unexpected turn of events.
His good and strong heart brought him through yet another shock two days ago. You see, my female owner’s mother had been away for more than a week. So life’s been pretty boring, with just her father in the house. And despite all her mother had said in the past about how my female owner shouldn’t waste money bringing us to the vet etc, I know that her mother really cares for us (at this point, I realise that I’m getting very long-winded).
So anyway, I missed her mother and knowing that she would be back yesterday, I decided to find a way to spring a surprise on her. My plot was to welcome her back, by waiting for her in her room. And as luck would have it, on Wednesday, my female owner’s father forgot to replace the fencing that kept us in the Balcony, and with all my mighty might, I climbed out of the Balcony and headed towards the master bedroom.
As I was a day early, I decided to snooze under a cupboard… and my great escapade probably tired me out so much that I overslept… and woke up only when her mother returned home and turned the house upside down trying to locate me (she has a knee problem and is quite round, but she has to go on her fours in search of me).
Sob, so much for trying to surprise her. My attempt became a nasty shock to the elderly couple. In addition, Dodo, my gentle alpha male brother, chided me for being the sole author of that fiasco. My female owner also almost had a heart attack when her mother told her that I was missing ("your big-head turtle went missing")
Big-head??
His good and strong heart brought him through yet another shock two days ago. You see, my female owner’s mother had been away for more than a week. So life’s been pretty boring, with just her father in the house. And despite all her mother had said in the past about how my female owner shouldn’t waste money bringing us to the vet etc, I know that her mother really cares for us (at this point, I realise that I’m getting very long-winded).
So anyway, I missed her mother and knowing that she would be back yesterday, I decided to find a way to spring a surprise on her. My plot was to welcome her back, by waiting for her in her room. And as luck would have it, on Wednesday, my female owner’s father forgot to replace the fencing that kept us in the Balcony, and with all my mighty might, I climbed out of the Balcony and headed towards the master bedroom.
As I was a day early, I decided to snooze under a cupboard… and my great escapade probably tired me out so much that I overslept… and woke up only when her mother returned home and turned the house upside down trying to locate me (she has a knee problem and is quite round, but she has to go on her fours in search of me).
Sob, so much for trying to surprise her. My attempt became a nasty shock to the elderly couple. In addition, Dodo, my gentle alpha male brother, chided me for being the sole author of that fiasco. My female owner also almost had a heart attack when her mother told her that I was missing ("your big-head turtle went missing")
Big-head??
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My siblings and I
From top left: Dodo, Dona, me (Nooki) and Nanook