pondering

Recently, my female owner has been pondering about her concept of friendship.

What does it mean to be a best friend? Can you only have one best friend, or is it possible to have a few best friends? But doesn’t “best” mean only one? What does it mean to be friends? How do you distinguish between “friends”, “acquaintances” and “people you know”?

This year, my female owner realised that her concept of friends is highly selective and restrictive. She found that she made the mistake of lumping “close friends” and “friends” into one category. All along, in her mind, the hallmark of a true friendship is when she can have a reciprocal emotional and intimate relationship with the person. Finally, she realises that this is better termed as “close friends”. Obviously, my female owner has a small group of “close friends” whom she values greatly. Their interactions can swing from frivolous topics to intense sharing.

Friends are people whom she spends time with perhaps because of similar life circumstances or common interests. Interactions are mostly on a social basis. Nothing too intense or private. For some reason, my female exudes a friendly aura even though she really isn’t sociable, proactive or forthcoming. Again and again, she discovered that many friends regarded her as closer than she regarded them and worse still, she probably upset a number of people along the way because of this.

Perhaps it is possible to insert another category of friends – good friends – for people whom she is closer to… but don’t share too much emotional things with. After all, not many people are comfortable with such touchy-feely stuff.