trying to get well

My female owner told me to get well fast. My spirit is willing but my flesh and my shell is weak. I still feel ill... and dont have appetite. She told me that many human friends are still asking about me. I feel so touched at their concern. Thank you all for asking about me. I'm also trying to get well...

I know my female owner has been trying her best, giving me my daily jabs (I still hate them!), switching on the warm lamp whenever she's home and spending time with me to encourage me to get well fast.

vitamin supplement

My female owner told the vet that I had not been eating. The vet was quite concerned about it and prescribed soluble vitamin powder for me. For me to consume it, my female owner would need to spike my water with the powder. The small bottle of vitamin supplement cost my female owner about $35. She was mortified at the cost, espcially since she does not believe in taking health supplements for herself. Natural is the best, she says.

Together with another course of anti-botics and consultation fees, the visit yesterday cost her about $80. I feel so bad... How come Nanook is so healthy? All she does is eat and sleep but she doesn't fall ill.

exhausted

My female owner brought me to the vet today. Let's just say that both of us were traumatised by the visit for different reasons. This bout of illness is taking a toil on us. I'm getting paranoid, each time I see my female owner, because I dont know what she's going to do to me next. I'm so scared of the injections. At the same time, my female owner is struggling to care for me. Although she doesn't blame me for my illness, I can tell that she's getting worn out, with all the running around and juggling with work, flute exam, housework and caring for my other siblings.

saved by an E

I found out the meaning of my name! Well, sort of...

Last week when I was ill, my female owner's clever friend suddenly asked her what's my name. So she said "Nooki". Then he looked both shocked and bemused and said "What?!" Then my female owner repeated herself, perplexed at his outburst. So he asked her "Do you know what that means?" And she said "Small corner". The clever friend, a walking dictionary, replied "That's a nook. But do you know what nooki(e) means?"

"Err, no"

"Nooki(e) in UK slang means to have a quick make-out"


The consolation that he offered was that my name is spelt as N-O-O-K-I and not N-O-O-K-I-E

poked

My female owner came home in a nasty mood. I know, because she poked my feet as a form of greeting. She must have had one of her horror days at work, since even her aikido class could not dispel her negative energy. Maybe she's in a bad mood partly because of me too...

I Know Who Holds Tomorrow

I don't know about tomorrow,
I just live from day to day;
I don't borrow from its sunshine,
For it's skies may turn to gray.
I don't worry o'er the future,
For I know what Jesus said;
And today I'll walk beside Him,
For He knows what lies ahead

(chorus)
Many things about tomorrow
I don't seem to understand;
But I know who holds tomorrow,
And I know who holds my hand

Ev'ry step is getting brighter
As the golden stairs I climb;
Ev'ry burden's getting lighter,
Ev'ry cloud is silver-lined.
There the sun is always shining,
There no tear will dim the eye;
At the ending of the rainbow,
Where the mountains touch the sky.

(chorus)

guilt

And so, a morning ritual is established. I waited gingerly for my female owner to appear. I know that she is going to prick me again with anti-biotics. I spent my waking moments thinking of ways to escape the jab. Although she's bigger and stronger than me, I must not give up without a struggle. The last time I had a prolapse and was sent to the vet, I was forcefed. My food was doped with disgusting tasting medicine. I won that food battle by simply refusing to open my mouth. My two owners exhausted themselves trying to coax me to eat.


The outcome for this morning was slightly different and unexpected. Of course, my female owner won. This time, she was able to inject deeper into my muscles (i.e. the syringe went in further into my foot). What was unexpected was, in the midst of the struggle, she pricked herself with the needle and started bleeding too.


oh... now I feel so guilty.. What have I done to her now.

hungry

I'm hungry....

The veggie my female owner fed me yesterday was yucky. She gave me the same thing again today. She also boiled some carrots for me. YUCKS. Don't really have appetite for carrots, especially when they are of the same colour as my tub. I know I should be grateful to her for taking the efforts to boil carrots, especially when the only other thing she is willing to boil these days is hot water, to cook cup noodles for her meals. BUT.... I'm a sick turtle... I want my pelllets.

I know that my oldest brother, Nana, loved carrots. My female owner once fed Nana, Dodo and Dona microwaved carrots (now, that's an unwise move, to feed us microwaved food). Nana loved it so much, he eyed for Dodo's orange coloured ear after all the carrots were gone. Poor Dodo felt so traumatised then. First time he saw his gentle giant brother being so carnivorous.

sick...

I'm feeling sick... just got my jab. It was a tug-of-war between my female owner and I. She saw me trying to climb over the tank and decided to jab me then, in an attempt to sedate me. She achieved her aim. The struggle I put up to avoid the jab zapped away all my energy and now, I'm feeling so exhausted. Once she had her victory, my female owner threw in a leafy stalk as instructed by my vet. Yuck. Can I have my usual pellets please?

road to recovery

my first morning at home...

so painful...

My female owner switched on the warm lamp as instructed by my vet. The warm lamp is supposed to increase my metabolic rate. But it's really bright and invasive. My female owner intends to get a proper warm lamp for me (the one that is shining happily at me now is a improvised one). Hope she gets one in pink shade.

I know that I'm supposed to get my injection soon. I'm not looking forward to it. I know my female owner is not looking forward to giving it to me too. For one, she knows we dont like it. For another, she has to single-handedly hold me, pull out my leg and jab me. How's that for a pair of hands? Even at the hospital, they work in pairs to tend to me. Here, she works alone, untrained but full of love.

I haven't seen my siblings. I need to be quarantined from them until I'm okay. It's lonely being in this tank. I feel scared at times. One thing I dont miss though, is my female owner's flute. She put me in the same room as her while she practiced the flute. It was really diffcult to sleep with the bright lamp on, and the flute practice.

But, for the sake of everyone who loves me, I must get well fast!

so many people to thank

Hi everyone,

I'm back! My female owner just brought me back from the hospital today. It's the longest time I ever spent alone, in a tank all by myself. I'm still a little wobbly from all the injections and stitches. I heard that I would need to be given an anti-biotic injection every morning. Not really looking forward to that.

It's a nice feeling to be back at home. I cant be let out yet, but it feels good just being home, with my siblings and female owner around me.

I also want to thank all my female owner's friends who supported her through these two days (you know, if the owner is in good mental health, the pets will benefit too).

For D, who encouraged her through msn and helped her make the necessary phone calls when she was in a state of shock. For accompanying her to see me, at the expense of lunch. And yes, you were brave enough to see in her car when she was an emotional wreck. You were so patient!

For L, who would always pray for me and ask about me whenever I suffer a prolapse.

For Q, who constantly enquired about me.

For B & E, who took time to watch a movie with my female owner to cheer her up and for being in the room when she was very upset.

For F, who spent the afternoon talking to her to calm her down. Your listening skills were therapeutic.

For D2, who readily agreed to drive her down today to see me and for visiting me.

For U, who actually kept your promise to accompany her to see me today (commitment issues, I heard), even though there were dogs around.

For J, who accompanied her to see me during lunch today, and accompanied her to bring me home after work.

For Y, who kindly offered to drive her down to the hospital to pick me up today even though it was out of the way.

Err... not sure if I missed out anyone else... but if I did, please dont hold it against me.. I'm but a recovering turtle. Although this was an ordeal for me... through the storm, I feel so blessed, that so many human friends care about me. For your sakes, I will get well!

I miss Nooki

Female owner:

I miss seeing you under the trolley
When I wake in the morning
I miss seeing your silhouette
When I return home at night
I miss seeing you
Perched in the middle of the feeding tank
Patiently waiting for your once-in-two-days meal
I miss seeing you scrambling towards me
When you want my attention

I wish you will not suffer from this again
I wish I know how to truly take care of you
I wish you would know that I never meant for you to be ill
That if I could,
I would take your pain upon myself to
Free you from all discomfort

I want to see you smile again
I want to hold you in my hands
Seeing you helpless is driving me crazy
Pray, tell me, what should I do?
I find it hard to eat
I cant bring myself to sleep
Even playing my silly flute without you around
Is not the same anymore

Nooki, you are a brave girl
You must hang on and get well fast

Nooki is still in hospital

Female owner:

Visited Nooki during lunch-time today. While less of her intestine is exposed, it is still huge and fiercely red. She was alert and awake, in her usual stoned manner. The hospital had placed her in a red tub and shone a warm light into it. While I stood there looking at her, she starting to move and even tried to scale the tub. So like her usual self.

Th vet called me at 1500hr and informed that she needed to carry out the operation. She cautioned that as a result of infection, Nooki may get blood poisoning. Although she didnt use the word "die", it's pretty obvious what she meant. She also said that Nooki has constipation.

At this point in time, I do not have any updates, as it seems that the vet is still operating on her.

I want to thank all of those who have expressed concern for Nooki and me. Although she is just a fat, yellow terrapin to many, she means a lot to me. Your support, concern and encouragement have helped lifted my spirits and brought me through this trying day. If Nooki knows just how many people are concerned and praying for her, she would certainly be moved to tears.

For those who wish to visit her, she's at Mount Pleasant Hospital. Visiting hours are 1300-1400hr and 1700-1900hr. Just say her name and mine.

Nooki needs surgery

Female owner:

The vet just called to say that they are unable to put the intestine back into Nooki. They would need to cut away certain parts of her intestine which have gone bad. She has lost a lot of blood and is currently being stablised using anti-biotics.

Surgery is the only option. If not, she will die. The surgery will be done tomorrow and her prognosis is guarded.

For a turtle of 5 years, she has gone through a lot of pain and discomfort. I leave her life in God's hands.

Nooki is in hospital

Female owner:

Nooki was just sent to the animal hospital for surgery. I came home to find that she had a mega-big prolapse. The internal organ (I'm not sure what it is) that came out was about 1/4 of her shell size. It was bloated and dark red. As I drove her to the vet, she started bleeding and her internal organ started to look like raw meat. It later started to turn purple. Even the vet looked shakened (this vet also treated Dodo in his previous episodes. I was very glad to see her, coz I know she's really caring and gentle).

The vet will try to push back her organ and stitch her back. She will be staying overnight in the hospital. I hope that she will be discharged tomorrow. I don't mind paying for her surgery, as long as she can be treated.

Please pray for her...

a message from my female owner

My female owner wants to use this platform to inform MY readers that she got the official letter already. Not very sure what it means, but my female owner says that most of MY readers will be able to understand this coded message. If don't know what she means, then just ignore...

I also don't know what she means.

family

Without my female owner's parents around, evenings can be very quiet and dark... That's because my female owner also will take the opportunity to meet up with her friends. Hence, we turtles are often abandoned at home... like today.

My female owner has no qualms about being left alone at home, or being by herself for long periods of time. In fact, she relishes in being alone. Hmmm... not my cup of tea. Even though terrapins are solitary creatures, I prefer to have my siblings around me, especially at night. It's a nice and warm feeling knowing that your family is nearby while you are sleeping. And when you wake up, your family will be the first thing you see.

Please don't ever separate us.

1/4 second

My female owner's parents are out of town again! So we turtles only have our female owner for company.

My female owner is at home today. She continued with her flute practice and spent a long while trying to redeem her darn 1/2 a second. After much efforts, she managed to redeem 1/4 of a second. Still entering the bar too early for some profound reasons.

family photo 2007

Recently, my female owner attempted to take a family photo of us today. She wanted to capture our front view, similar to the photo you see right below. Alas, we were not very cooperative that day. We couldnt keep still all at the same time and started moving at different times and these were some of the shots she got.

In the end, she gave up trying to get a good shot of us.

neurotic perfectionist

I think that playing a musical instrument makes one neurotic. The best living example is my female owner. She is still grappling with her exam pieces and has started to use the metronome to make sure that she keeps to time. For a good 10 minutes today, she kept replaying a particular passage in order to figure why she is darn ½ a second early for the new bar. You get it? She spent 10 minutes trying to find out why she is ½ a second early.

In addition, her teacher has told her on several occasions that she is a split-second too early in her entries. A split-second? How does one measure a split-second?

Really, you need to be a neurotic perfectionist in order to be able to play a piece well.

Newsong - Light Your World - Trust His Heart

Enjoy the beautiful lyrics.

random shots

Nanook: Don't be deceived. She is bigger than she looks.

Me: I'm sure you can recognise me by now.

Dona: He's camera-shy. Look at his black shiny eyes. So intense.

Dodo: Wonder why he looks so sad.

update on the finger

It's Monday and my female owner is on leave again! I wonder why she can afford to be on leave so often. She must have worked really hard in the earlier part of this year.

And despite her mishap, she's still playing her flute (the close-hole one of course). I think she should stop exerting herself because her wound opens up everytime she plays (ie she's still bleeding!). Such energy and intensity!

second fiddle

My female owner, in her absent-mindedness, cut herself very badly on her fourth finger. While it took ages for the bleeding to stop, it was the least of her concern. She was more bothered that she can't practice her flute anymore. Her $3000+ flute is open-hole, meaning that each hole needs to be covered properly, in order to produce a good tone. It would be diffcult to achieve that, given the plaster on her finger.

In desperation, my female owner took out her first flute (this one cost her $1000) and realised that she was able to produce nice tones because the flute is closed-hole (and we turtles thought we could have a respite from her practices!). Hence, she decided to use this flute for the time being (talk about being second fiddle... or flute)

Actaully, I think she sounds better with the cheaper flute. Why did she buy an expensive flute in order to sound worse?

growing sideways

The events of the recent months have taken a toil on my female owner and it's showing. In other words, she is beginning to be like me - getting rounder and fatter and her clothes (for me, it would be my shell) don't really fit anymore.

There was a time when things were "happy-go-lucky" for her and she would play badminton up to three times aweek. Alas, her badminton kakis started to leave her one by one for greener pastures. She also broke up with my male owner who had, a few months before, specially bought a badminton racquet suitable for her playing style. She chose not to keep the racquet for it reminded her of fantasies gone wrong (that they would grow old together playing badminton and developing themselves into a formidable couple). So, she stopped playing badminton altogether, save for the occasional game once or twice a month.

Her gym kakis also vanished into thin air, leaving her with little motivation to hit the gym. To add to that depressing turn of events, she started to get stressed over work and her flute exam, causing her to seek refuge in her favourite de-stressor..... FOOD! All kinds of food - ice-cream, chocolates, fried food, titbits. You name any fattening food, she probably like it. She also started partying, and that meant huge dinners and alcohol...

All roads lead to Rome and the accumulation of all these events over the past few months have led to one major consquence - she put on weight and became flabbier! Wahahaha. Now the owner looks like the pet. Join the club! =p

turmoil

Today, my female owner received some news which may change her life (and ours) forever. Not one to be decisive, I reckon that she will be in turmoil for the next few weeks. Better keep out of her way!

narcissism

Allow me to be narcissitic and show you some photos of myself today.

boundaries

My female owner came home looking drained and unfulfilled.

It turns out that her client in crisis wanted to harm himself and she had to step in to take the necessary precautions. That meant that she ended up talking to several parties (the drained part)… and missing her aikido class in the process (this is the unfulfilled part). Certainly not what she expected, for a week which has only 4 working days!

One thing she always found difficult doing was setting boundaries with her clients. She can’t bear to say no to people. Hence, she struggled to say no to her client when he wanted to see her at that very moment. But then, my female owner always had problems setting boundaries anyway. Even for physical ones, she did not set a proper boundary for us turtles and this eventually led to Nana’s death. So what more psychological boundaries?

therapy

Counselling can be emotionally draining. My female owner kinda reached a breaking point today when she saw a client who has several issues. Because of the complexity of the problems, she felt inadequate and unequipped to deal with his situation. She ended the session feeling lousy about her competency as a counsellor and wondering if she had done her client more harm than good.

During lunch, she went through a defusing session (why do humans use such big words?) with a counsellor friend. Basically, it was a time when she could talk to someone about the session and resolve her emotional issues. She spent the time arguing for her personal and professional beliefs, exploring where she could have done better for future cases (?! she still want to take up such cases?!) and also receiving guidance from a more experienced counsellor.

Guess she ended up feeling better about the whole thing and armed with new ideas on how to handle such cases. Bet the client would never, in his wildest dreams, know the kind of impact he had on her.

Pet therapy is so much easier! We just surround our human friends with unconditional attention and affection and they will feel better! Try it!

survival instinct

Soon after my owners broke up a few months ago, my female owner went to cut, dye and perm her hair, all for the sake of the traditional "break-up-so-must-get-a-new-hairstyle" therapy. We turtles got a shock when we saw her that day. You can't blame us, because we have seen her with straight hair all our lives.

Over the weekend, she did another one of her BUSMGANH stunt, minus the BU part. So now her hair is curlier than before (she got bolder). All well's except that she spent $500 on hair vouchers, just because she liked the hair stylist (not in that romantic way, coz he's gay). If that's not enough, today, she coughed out $400 for one of her pursuits (don't ask me what, coz she has so many crazy commitments, that I lost track).

As usual, Nanook panicked when she heard that my female owner became $900 poorer over two days. She asked if my female owner would have enough to buy our food. Dodo wasted no time in pointing out to her that my female owner has recently bought THREE bottles of food for us. That should fill our stomachs for 3 months.

Peace ensues in the Balcony.

borderline

My female owner was feeling bored, so she surfed Psychology Today and did a "Do I need therapy?" test. She was serious about finding out if she needed therapy and hence, she did the test carefully.

Here are the results:

What do your responses tell us?
Although your scores were generally very good, you had symptoms in at least one category. This suggests that you should probably consult with a mental health professional for further testing or treatment, especially if you are distressed about the symptoms you are experiencing. There is most certainly a treatment out there that will help improve the symptoms you are experiencing.

The following are the areas of concern detected by the screening:
i) You have experienced symptoms of a major depressive episode, but not enough to qualify as a full-blown episode, or as major depressive disorder.
ii) You appear to suffer from some symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder.


While (i) did not surprise her, (ii) certainly did. According to the same website,

Borderline personality disorder is a serious mental illness characterized by pervasive instability in moods, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and behavior. This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual's sense of identity...


The wikipedia states that some common features are:

P - Paranoid ideas
R - Relationship instability
A - Angry outbursts, affective instability, abandonment fears
I - Impulsive behavior, identity disturbance
S - Suicidal behavior
E - Emptiness


Hmmm..........

Perhaps my male owner was right after all. Towards the end of their relationship, he told my female owner that he thought that she had some mental illness.

fluffy

overheard from the pulpit today:

I'm not fat, i'm just fluffy.

Dodo's love language

I had a minor dispute with Dodo today, regarding his love language. He insisted that his love languages are quality time and physical touch, and not just quality time (as I stated previously). When I pointed out that he would retract into his shell when touched, he reminded me that he likes being stroked under his chin. It's just that the person must know his "love spot" and he will extend his neck for the person to stroke.

Next time, you are welcome to try.

Love Language

Ever heard of the Five Love Languages?

My female owner was introduced to it many years ago but it was only recently that she managed to get hold of a copy of the book. The author, Dr Gray Chapman, argues that different personalities express/receive love (whether it is romantic, platonic or familial) in different ways. The five love languages are:

Quality Time
Words of Affirmation
Gifts
Acts of Service
Physical Touch

At the end of the book (The Five Love Languages for Singles), she completed a self-assessment tool to find out her primary love language. This is the results, ranked in order.

1 - Acts of Service
2 - Quality Time
3 - Receiving Gifts
4 - Words of Affirmation
5 - Physical Touch

Hmmm…..

I looked around my siblings and tried to decide what their primary love language is:

Dodo – Quality Time: Coz he’s always running out to meet my female owner
Dona – Words of Affirmation: Coz he doesn’t like to be touched so love has to be expressed verbally
Nanook – Gifts: Need I say more? She’s always waiting for food
Me – Acts of Service: Just keep the Balcony clean!

Hmmm….. Looks like we have something in common with our female owner, we don’t fancy physical touch very much… And my poor female owner! She has to adapt to our different personalities!